noasi on a smaller scale

Convinced the ‘rents to visit tonight, and pulled out the port. Told Mom of the ex-Navy Seal I met at the gym today, and reminisced about Pup and her antics. Lovely evening.

I can’t wait for INVALID DATE! So excited! 😒

How to have perfect posture:

  1. Borrow sheep from neighbors
  2. Let your guard down around said sheep
  3. Don’t sidestep the ram when he charges
  4. Injure tailbone
  5. Realize the only non-painful position is standing with perfect posture
  6. Stand with perfect posture

Okay, @smokey, I timed it. From dump to stick was about 40 minutes. 🐑🍁🍂

I have named the wether* Wembley. My neighbor, the sheep’s owner, is a little scandalized I’m naming his food, but I’m okay with it.

* wethers are castrated male sheep kept with rams, for company. One never wants to keep a sheep solo, they are social beings.

“I named the ram.”

“Okay, what is it?”

“Dodge.”

“Kitt.”

“I know, right?” 😂

This girl cracks me up. 🐑

Injury update: stand a lot (can’t sit, bruised tailbone), walk slowly (torn off toe nail), watch the bruises, endure basic bodily functions (impaired by pain and internal swelling).

Well fuck. I’m a real sheep farmer now. This asshole rammed me not once but twice. Urgent care, here I come. Asshat sheep. 🐑

This floor continues to crack me up. I didn’t think I’d become use to it.

My house hasn’t been this clean in years. #avoidingwork

Well, I guess my winter reading list just changed. Found this list via Mattis’ Call Sign Chaos (recommended) www.marines.mil/News/Mess… 📚

“Hey, your mom says the sheep like mulberry leaves.”

“They do, they’ve stripped the bottom branches of the leaves in my yard.”

“I have a bin full of them, want ‘em?”

“YES!”

🐑🍃🍂🍁

Kitt: 1 Blackberries: 17

I keep finding the sheepie lounging under the orange tree in the mornings. I am much amused at their nonchalance around me. 🐑🍊

Okay, so, sheep do not like green beans, carrots are fine, and apples are worth sprinting across the field to be first in line.

Okay, people, how do I not have sage?

Go Nats! Whooooooooo! ⚾️

Stepdad keeps turning on Seal Team during WS game breaks and TURN THE GAME BACK ON argh. ⚾️

Whooo! Game 7! ⚾️

And during commercial breaks, we’re watching city council proceedings, and hooboy, what an evening contrast. Fascinating to watch how easily a few close-minded people can control the many.

😒 Nats. Compare to ALL THE OTHER RUNNERS TO FIRST, not just Turner’s run. Fuckin’ bullshit. ⚾️

Was so sure the Nats found the bats with the hits in them, and then the bottom of the fifth happened. 😒 ⚾️

Meetings for the week donnnnnnnnnne! 🎉

Somehow I managed to convince the ‘rents to learn Settlers of Catan and play with me and @snookca. I call this Friday night #winning.

These sheep crack me up. I come outside and they come running.